Do you believe in karma? I do, and I have an example of it effing me. So I was out on my long run on Sunday, I was going 2hr30 so I took a few powerbar gels with me. After I had my first gel I went to put the empty wrapper in my little running short pocket thing, those pockets are small as hell. So naturally the packet was unsecure in that little pocket and it fell out. Now, here is where I made my mistake. I saw it fall out and you know what I did? Yeah, I ignored it, just kept on running. I thought to myself that I really should go back and pick it up, but I didn’t. Why? Because I am an asshole. Nature immediately recognized the fact that I was an asshole, and it decided to do something about it. Mother Earth promptly launched her assault. First thing she did was put this big ole’ rock on the path, I immediately stepped on it and rolled my ankle. Not gonna lie, it hurt but I was able to carry on. Next thing she did was set this giant gross bug after me. I was running and I look down to see this demon creature just feasting on my leg blood. I let out a little yelp then I slapped that sucker and it exploded in a bloody mess. It was gross as hell, but I guess I won that battle because that little bastard was dead and I was still rolling on my run. Finally mother nature just said eff’ it and cranked up the temperature to about 150degrees, at this point I essentially started melting and bonked hard the last 30min of my run. I got home and did my post long run weigh in (for science purposes) and I had lost 10lbs! Needless to say I was sufficiently drained of all my vital energies. Usually this wouldn’t be to big of an issue, but the problem was that a mere 14hrs after I finished the long run I had my first official marathon workout with the boys. I tried like hell to re-fuel and re-charge, but it was futile. Mother Earth decided to finish me off by making it 300degrees at 8:00 Monday morning. By the time I finished the warm up I knew it was only a matter of time. So right around the 10th interval of the workout the body said eff it, started getting the chills, goosebumps and blurry vision. Bonk! Well played Mother Earth., well played indeed…you cold hearted bitch. (guess I didn’t help my cause by trying to put in 40miles of work in 18hrs to finish up 150mile in 7days…)
So folks when you do find yourself exhausted and dehydrated on these hot summer days there is only one remedy, well there are actually several remedies, but my favourite remedy is a nice cold beer. Come on now, I’m not an alcoholic, we all know that summer is beer season and I really like a nice cold pint. It is delicious and sexy. As you know by now, I went to school at Colorado State in Fort Collins, Colorado. Fort Collins just happens to be the best beer town in the world…yeah the whole friggen world! What makes it so great? Well it is the cool, clean, crisp mountain water no doubt! Fort Collins has a whole bunch of breweries, but the best three are New Belgium, Fort Collin’s Brewery and O’Dells. If you are ever in Fort Collins do this; get a bike. Ride it to Fort Collins Brewery. Sample their yummy beer. get back on bike. Ride down the street to O’Dell’s. Sample their yummy beer. Get back on your bike. Ride down the road to New Belgium. Do their tour. Then sample their yummy beer. Once you have done that you will be drunk and you should probably stop riding your bike around because you may crash into the Poudre river. I have completed that mission many a time, and I have yet to be disappointed. I was planning on going out to the Fort for July, but unfortunately the logistics just didn’t work out. I’m pretty bummed about that. So now instead of relaxing out in the Fort under the beautiful Colorado sun sipping on a Sunshine Wheat and hangin’ with my boys, I will be in Guelph busting out 150mile weeks and just friggen givin er’ hell, with Reider, GillyBoy, The Farmer, Cleave-O and Wild Bill. But ya know what? That’s a pretty damn solid option as well. I love the Guelph, Let’s get at it!
So back to beer. I was craving a New Belgium beer so hard the other day and I decided that I needed one asap, I also figured that all of Canada needed to taste the awesomeness that the mighty NewBelgium Brewery has to offer. I quickly decided that I was going to start importing it into Canada. I was going to become an importer. A beer importer to be exact, it was going to be awesome. This dream lasted all of 20min. I internetted the criteria to become an importer. Man, it is very, very hard, quite expensive and fairly tedious to become an importer. I thought with NAFTA this importing business would be a breeze. So Anyways, that’s not gonna happen. I’m probably not going to be an importer any time soon. I just want a friggen sunshine wheat! gah! The man getting in the way, eff you the man. I keep getting screwed over by the Man, the Man and Mother Earth. It’s been a rough week.